Thirty-two years …

My husband and I celebrate our thirty-second wedding anniversary June 15, 2017. I was curious, so I googled for more information. Thirty-two years is 11,689 days, 280,536 hours, 16,832,160 minutes, and 1,009,929,600 seconds. That makes me tired just thinking about that! In June, 1985, I was days from turning twenty-nine. I planned the wedding myself. My family did not attend. Sad, but true. However, I did get to do my wedding my way. It was lovely. I wore a white gown with a southern belle almost off the shoulder neckline. The dress as well as the veil was trimmed in tiny pearls. I had one bridesmaid who wore pink. My soon-to-be step-daughter, had just turned eight and was sweet in her white dress. My soon-to-be step-son was thirteen and served as his Dad’s best man. Robert’s best friend and a newly acquainted friend of mine walked me down the aisle. My groom was in a light gray tux with a cut away jacket. He was so handsome! I arrived at the church, where we met, early, so as to oversee the flower arrangements. As I headed towards the sanctuary, my groom came around the side corner of the building. Now I knew it was bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding. There he was; not wanting to deflate, or puncture the chance for him not to see me that day until I came down the aisle, I did the only thing I could do … I dove into the flower truck. I remember calling out, “Help, help!” I honestly don’t remember how I got out of there, but, I must have, cause we did get married. The flowers were lovely, by the way, white roses accented with pink flowers, can’t remember what kind, but again … lovely. We had one large arrangement in front of the pulpit and another one in the center of the refreshment table.

The ceremony was accompanied by the choir, with whom I sang every Sunday. Our choir director sang The Lord’s Prayer in his rich baritone. We left the church after pictures, and followed our guests across the street to a large Southern home that had been converted into a restaurant. They rented out to receptions as well. Ours was held on the wrap-around porch. Oh, it did sprinkle rain on us as we walked to our reception, which is good luck for the bride and groom as it signifies that your marriage will last. A knot that is wet is hard to untie … so … the tied knot between you two on a rainy day means your marriage will be tightly united. This has proven to be true for us. We have survived many ups and downs, ins and outs, support and indifference, from my side of the family. But we did survive together. I am bipolar and did not know it. I was unmedicated for the first half of our marriage. Even with medication, rapid cycling bipolar individuals cope with frequent and unexpected mood swings that seemingly come out of nowhere. Intense and detrimental to relationships personal, professional, and primarily exhibited more frequently to the one with whom you live. Bless my husband; he has endured much; he said once, “God help me, I love you!” He has indeed needed God’s help.

You were and are there for us, Dear Lord. From the very start, introducing us in Your church. Thank You for standing by us, holding our hands, and sometimes grabbing them and putting our hands together … reminding us how much we did love each other; You have been within our marriage. You blessed our union. You have stood by us when one or both of us were willing to give up. You have been the Wise Father we so desperately needed to love us unconditionally. Our marriage couldn’t have survived without You. Thank You for the life You have provided for us together and for the growth we’ve made individually and as a couple. This celebration is one that all three of us celebrate … together in love … Your perfect love showing us the way, the truth, and the life!

Oh, at the reception, on that beautiful Southern porch, I sang to my groom, accompanied on the guitar by a dear friend I’d smoked a cigar with the night before. That’s another story for another time.

 

The Wedding Song

by Noel Paul Stookey in 1971

Paul from the group Peter, Paul, and Mary

 

He is now to be among you at the calling of your hearts
Rest assured this troubadour is acting on His part.
The union of your spirits, here, has caused Him to remain
For whenever two or more of you are gathered in His name
There is Love, there is Love.

 

A man shall leave his mother and a woman leave her home
And they shall travel on to where the two shall be as one.
As it was in the beginning is now and til the end
Woman draws her life from man and gives it back again.
And there is Love, there is Love.

 

Well then what’s to be the reason for becoming man and wife?
Is it love that brings you here or love that brings you life?
And if loving is the answer, then who’s the giving for?
Do you believe in something that you’ve never seen before?
Oh there is Love, there is Love.

 

Oh the marriage of your spirits here has caused Him to remain
For whenever two or more of you are gathered in His name
There is Love, there is Love.

 

 

Ephesians 4:2-3  Living Bible 
Be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. Try always to be led along together by the Holy Spirit and so be at peace with one another.

 

 

1 Corinthians 13:4-5  International Children’s Bible 
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous, it does not brag, and it is not proud. Love is not rude, is not selfish, and does not become angry easily. Love does not remember wrongs done against it.

 

 

1 John 4:16  God’s Word Translation 
We have known and believed that God loves us. God is love. Those who live in God’s love live in God, and God lives in them.

 

 

Ephesians 4:32  The Living Bible 
Instead, be kind to each other, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, just as God has forgiven you because you belong to Christ.

 

 

Love is a symbol of eternity.  It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end.  ~Author Unknown

 

 

Love does not consist of gazing at each other, but in looking together in the same direction.  ~Antoine de Saint-Exupery

 

 

We’re all a little weird.  And life is a little weird.  And when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall into mutually satisfying weirdness – and call it love – true love.  ~Robert Fulghum, True Love

 

 

I love being married.  It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.  ~Rita Rudner

 

Puncture

to make (a hole) by piercing: to depreciate or deflate: a hole or depression made by a sharp object

2 thoughts on “Thirty-two years …”

  1. Thanks Jan, this was a wonderful story. Love is a an awareness of life, marriage is an expression of that awareness and each passing year becomes a great awareness of love. Thank you for sharing.

  2. Thanks, Mel,
    It was fun reliving our wedding day … I’ll never forget diving into the flower truck … we both remember this fondly. He says he caught me out of the corner of his eye. : ) Yes … love only grows stronger and life shared more precious.

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